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THIS IS MY HAVEN
blogging the bits in my life

my INTRO.
ZUOHAN, 06121988
rickdecgozz@hotmail.com

23yrold boy with a 40yrold intellect
NTU Communication Studies jog.gym.eat.laugh.sleep.sing.travel

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my STATS.

my BUDS.

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my UPDATES.

I'm in Taipei now! :)

Friday, April 29, 2005
I'm.. discouraged.

Warning: The following post might deteriorate your mood.

I'm discouraged. I can't stop myself from procrastinating. I've been absent for school for two days, both days feeling sick. I pick up my pen and coerced myself to do my tutorials. I gave up when I realised I was having so much difficulty. F Maths? What happened to my interest in Maths?

I miss working in Starbucks. Yesterday when I conversed with 'xclsive' over the net, I felt so joyful when I could converse about work. Yet I had to forgo my passion in working and torment myself to study hard.

I swear I fervently encourage myself. It never works though. One moment I'm telling myself to stop slacking and complete all my undone tutorials. And after completing one assignment which will be far most the easiest, I will turn away from my books and succumb to television and snacks. When I finally regain my mood for doing work, its 11pm. I will silently reprimand myself for procrastinating, and set my alarm to 2/3 am, before tucking into bed.

Alarm rings, and I was supposed to do some work.

No, I'm not determined. I will go back and sleep.

What should I do? I need someone to push me academically. I promise to be hardworking if there's someone that I can study with. Someone who is patient and guide me while I'm doing my maths. But no longer do I enjoy the luxury of studying as a group. I'm in Jc, and it should be more independent.

I don't blame canoeing for insufficient time. I am clear of my own faults.

I tell myself 1st of May (Sun) will be the start of my transformation. From a lazy discouraged brat to a cheerful disciplined boy who completed all assignments.

I like to achieve goals. I want to do well. So its time to buck up.
ZUOHAN, OUT!
end of muses, rants & complaints.